Should I move out of my parents’ house?
There are countless reasons people choose to live at their parents’ house. Some folks who live at home are thinking of moving out after graduating college. Others are saving up until they feel financially ready to pull the trigger and leave their parents’ home. And still others want to make sure that their aging parents are taken care of and supported.
While the benefits to living at home are many (see: no rent, free on-site laundry and an endless supply of home-cooked meals), there are also a lot of reasons to consider moving out. More than just acquiring a no-curfew policy or gaining a place to invite dates to after dinner, having your own space can be a fulfilling, rewarding experience that helps you grow out of your comfort zone and become more independent.
So, when is moving out the right option?
When is moving out the right option?
Before you consider moving out, it’s important to ask yourself why you’re currently staying with your parents. What has made your parents’ house right for you so far? Knowing the answer will help you make a more informed choice about whether or not it’s time to move out. Here’s some examples of reasons why you might still find living with your parents rewarding:
- It’s financially stable. For many, living at home without the extra burden of rent and utility bills can be a life-saver. If you need an extra financial cushion while you save up to move out, there’s nothing wrong with staying until you’ve got enough funds to move with confidence.
- I enjoy the company. There’s nothing wrong in admitting you enjoy your parents’ house! They raised you, after all. If you like eating dinner together, hanging out on weekends and spending other forms of quality time with your parents, you shouldn’t feel ashamed of living with them. What is worth considering is whether or not you could still make time for your parents without living with them — and whether or not that’s an arrangement you’d like.
- It’s been helpful during a hard time. A lot of people move back in with their parents after living outside of the home for a time. This can happen for lots of reasons: financial hardship, a romantic breakup or a major career change can all put you back in your childhood bedroom until you’re ready to move back out. If that’s the case, taking a leave of absence from independent living is by no means a bad choice.
While different, each of these reasons are valid when it comes to living at home. Once you’ve honed in on your specific reasons for living with your parents, it’s time to ask yourself — do my goals still align with my reasons for living at home?
Determining whether your goals match your living situation
A lot of people think about moving out as the “next step” in adulthood. It’s the leap you take to become a more independent person. But instead of simply viewing the choice to move out as a black and white endeavor, it pays to consider whether or not doing so aligns with your goals.
For instance, if you’re living at home because you’ve been financially unstable for a time — and your goal is to build back your savings account — moving out with no money to your name isn’t a great idea, because it’s completely unaligned with your goals.
However, if financial freedom is your goal, and you’ve finally managed to save up a sizeable chunk of cash, then it’s probably for the best that you do move out. Staying at home even after your goal of financial stability has been met might be a sign that you’re hanging onto the security blanket of living at your parents’ house instead of chasing down your dreams.
This goes for most goals. If you’ve met your goals but you’re still hanging onto living at home because it’s simply convenient, then it’s time to reassess your needs. If you haven’t yet met your goals, and living at home helps you achieve those goals for now, then it’s perfectly acceptable to stay where you are.
Let’s try this with some of our other examples. If you’re living at home because you enjoy the company, and you find it hard to make time for your parents when you’re living away from home, then by all means, stay where you’re at. However, if you know there are ways you could still visit your parents often but you choose to live at home because it’s easy, it might be time to move out.
Now let’s apply a goal-oriented mindset to our last example: if you’ve fallen on hard times and you’re still going through difficulties, stick around at home as long as you can. But if you know deep down that you’ve passed those hardships, and you’ve built back the kind of life you want, it’s time to start looking for a place of your own again.
Ultimately, it’s all about what you want out of life. By assessing your choices in terms of goals and deciding what’s best for you based on that — and not based on what other people think — you can make a more informed decision about whether or not now’s the time to move out.
Interested in more goal-oriented advice like this? Drop us a line.
We are a coaching company with expertise in lots of different areas like mental wellness, career, relationships, parenting and a whole lot more. While coaching in The Journal That Talks Back™ can help you to take a deeper look at the above topics, we recognize that there are times when other resources, like therapy and/or counselling, may make more sense. As such, we have begun to develop a Mental Health Directory with well over 800 resources and we are investing time and effort into really growing it. It is also developed in a super user friendly way (we hope) so that it's easier to navigate than say another government website. Click the button below to check out our Mental Health Directory.